In the standard American split, groomsmen pay for their own attire, travel, lodging, and their share of the bachelor party. The groom pays for the thank-you gifts, wedding-day extras, and often the matching accessories like ties or pocket squares. Everything else is negotiable, and the negotiation should happen at the ask, not at the invoice.
Here's the full ledger, and then the more important part: how to talk about it.
What groomsmen typically cover
- Attire. Suit or tux rental or purchase, typically anywhere from around $100 to $300. If you pick an expensive look, expect to subsidize it; choosing the outfit and billing your friends for a designer version is how resentments are born.
- Travel and lodging. Getting to the wedding and the bachelor party, and sleeping somewhere. This is usually the biggest line, especially for destination anything.
- The bachelor party share. Groomsmen split the costs, traditionally covering the groom's share between them. The best man herds this budget, which is one of several reasons he earns a better gift.
What the groom covers
- The thank-you gifts. Non-optional. Your guys will spend hundreds of dollars to stand next to you, and the gift is the acknowledgment. Typically $50-$150 per groomsman; the groomsmen packs land in that band at $59.99-$69.99 per wallet depending on party size, boxed with name cards.
- Matching accessories. Ties, pocket squares, or socks you require for the look are on you. The rule of thumb: if they only own it because of your wedding, you buy it.
- Wedding-day logistics. The getting-ready room, that morning's food and drinks, boutonnieres, and any group transportation you arrange.
How to have the money talk
Attach the numbers to the ask. Something like: 'Rough costs on your side: suit rental around $150, flights to the wedding, and a bachelor party we'll keep to a weekend, roughly $400 all-in.' It's one sentence, it feels slightly awkward for ten seconds, and it replaces eleven months of guessing.
If a groomsman is stretched thin, quietly adjust: cover his rental, pick a driveable bachelor party, or give him an out with a named role instead. And note the direction of the ledger: your guys spend real money to be there, which is exactly why the thank-you gift should be something they actually use, not a prop for one weekend. If you're calibrating that budget, we did the math in how much to spend on groomsmen gifts.
Quick answers
Do groomsmen pay for their own suits?
Traditionally yes, for a reasonably priced suit or rental. If the groom requires something unusually expensive or single-use, the groom should subsidize the difference.
Who pays for the bachelor party?
The groomsmen split it, customarily covering the groom's share. The best man usually coordinates the budget, which works best when the groom states a price ceiling early.
Are groomsmen gifts required?
By etiquette, yes. Your wedding party spends hundreds of dollars and multiple weekends on you. The gift is the receipt that you noticed.